California Divorce - Children and Divorce

The combination of children and divorce is an issue that’s vitally important, but one that sometimes gets overlooked. When we’re going through a divorce, of course we think of the children involved because of child custody and visitation issues. But it can be hard to focus solely on their needs when we’re going through such a difficult personal time ourselves. Divorce is one of the most stressful things a person can go through. But children and divorce can make it even more stressful. It’s sometimes hard to remember that it affects the children at least as much, if not more, than it affects the adults.
But statistics show that children and divorce can be a volatile combination not just for the separating parents but for the children’s well-being. Children whose parents are divorcing or have been divorced are more likely, the numbers show, to have problems in school than children who don’t have to deal with divorce.
It even affects younger children, though it’s common to hear people say that smaller children don’t really know what’s going on and that they might not pick up on things older children will. While it’s true that their perception is different than that of older children, younger children can experience behavior problems from divorce ranging from the mild to the severe.
Some studies have shown that students with divorced parents were more likely to do more dangerous things like participate in violent activities and even experiment with drugs than other children. When it comes to children and divorce, these things need to be taken very seriously. But you should also not allow yourself to stay in a situation that’s bad because of this fear. If divorcing parents are mature and handle things like adults throughout the divorce, children can come out of the situation all right.
Not all children exposed to divorce end up expelled or doing drugs. Much has to do with the tone of the divorce, the contact with the parents (in particular, the father) after the divorce, and the attitude the parents have regarding the whole situation.
It’s important to behave like a mature adult during a divorce, and to be sure not to pull the children into the process. They should not be made to take sides. And while most people will avoid putting this pressure on the children, sometime it’s done inadvertently. Children can feel intense pressure to take sides whether or not the adults intend it.
Also, the stress of a divorce can take a toll on school work so it’s important to cooperate with your children’s teachers and even the school psychologist or guidance counselors during this time. There’s nothing wrong with letting them know the situation and asking them to be on the lookout for changes in your child’s behavior.
They’re in the best position to notice a number of changes, and they might without you even filling them in. But if they’re kept updated about the situation and you discuss your concerns with them, the issues that affect your child, and divorce stresses can be better managed.
Learn More About California Child Custody in the California Divorce Guide.

VIDEO: California Child Custody Attorneys


Tweet This!


Share this on Facebook


Share this on del.icio.us


Digg this!


Add this to Google Bookmarks


Seed this on Newsvine


Submit this story to Propeller


Share this on Reddit


Share this on Technorati


Email this via Yahoo! Mail


You are subscribed to email updates from California Divorce Blog

To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now.
Email delivery powered by Google

Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610